When communicating to recapture an ex, it is not always what is conveyed through speech that defines your success. To a greater extent, it is the unverbalized body language that can disclose your real intentions. If you are not honest in your endeavors, your body language will by no means keep quiet and you will fail. Here are some guidelines to use when seeking to talk with your ex.
Keeping eye contact is critical when talking with an ex. The eyes are not known as the windows to soul for nothing. When your ex looks into your eyes, they will be able to feel if you are honest in your attempts. Emotions such as anger, hurt, and resentment can likewise be felt. Therefore, when communicating to recapture your ex, the look in your eyes should be absent of all unfavorable emotions. When your ex looks into your eyes, they should sense the fondness you possess for them. Resolve any negative emotions so as to keep them from being projected through your eyes. Vary your eye contact with your ex so as to not make them feel uncomfortable, remembering to reconnect when expressing pertinent feelings. Remember that you too should look into their eyes when they are expressing deep feelings. This will convey a willingness to listen and understand their point of view.
Along with eye contact , body language is also crucial. You can be as loving with your eyes as you want but if your body language speaks differently then you will be labeled as insincere or worse, a liar. Regardless of how aggravated you become with the conversation, do not fold your arms. This is an immediate sign that you are becoming defensive, and are not actually wanting to listen. If possible, the best technique is to hold your ex’s hand. This establishes an emotional bond as well as reminds them of good times you had as a couple. If you are unable to hold their hand, aim to keep you hands at your side or use them in unthreatening gestures to help express your feelings.
When speaking to your ex what your eyes and body language say about you should not be taken lightly. Applying the techniques mentioned above will aid you in making sure that your message is not conflicted when communicating to recapture your ex.
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Filed under Your Ex by on Jan 27th, 2010. 
Every couple fights regardless of how good the relationship might be. It really does not matter how well you get along or how long you have been happy together eventually you will fight and there is always the possibility that you will break up. So what do you do if you break up and you still love him or her? You may want to know how to get your ex lover back and if you do then here are a couple of things that can get the ball rolling.
Whatever you do, do not run from a fight. No I am not saying to hunker down and fight until you win no matter what the outcome. I am saying that never take longer than a few minutes to cool down and begin to have some honest calm communication with your lover. Deal with things quickly and do not let them fester and get infected.
You will also want to be completely honest with your ex lover. Honesty really is the best solution to any problem. If you cannot be straight in your relationship you probably should not be in that relationship to begin with. Oh and by the way let your ex lover speak as well. Give him or her, the platform to be honest with you as well. You will both need to put forth an effort if this is going to work out.
You will also want to remember that it takes two to tango. It is not all your ex lover’s fault you most likely have a little blame as well. Here again is the importance of communication that is good communication, in a relationship. Sometimes it appears that all we want is for our feelings to get back on the right rack and we never consider that our ex has some feelings. Whatever you do make sure that you take their feelings into consideration. It seems that most of the time break ups occur over simple stuff. I have found that there are many relationships that suffer form making a mountain out of a mole hill. So I always say “do not sweat the small stuff” there are way to many big things to deal with in life to get all hot and bothered by the mundane things of life.
One final thing that should be essential in getting your ex lover back is to figure out what went wrong in the first place. Dig down and see if you can figure out what caused the break up in the first place. Once you have that down pat you can begin to get it fixed. It may have been your fault and it might have been theirs either way once you figure it out you can get on with the fix.
Yes, you can learn how to get your ex lover back if you want but it will start with the above suggestions. Why not put them into practice now and win your ex lover back and build your relationship anew.
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Filed under Your Ex by on Jan 23rd, 2010.
So you are trying to get back with your ex girlfriend. You have lost her and you are alone. You want her back. Attempts to regain her have been made, but she seems to be drifting even further. The reason why your ex girlfriend is drifting even further away is because you are making lots of mistakes.
The most typical mistakes a man makes while trying to get back together with his ex girlfriend are:
* Trying to make her feel bad by faking being in misery or acting depressed around her. Hoping she will get back with you out of pity.
* Wasting lots of money on gifts for her
* Promising change ( things will be different etc)
* Using manipulation to get her to come back to you
* Being too sensitive and nice. Saying you love her so much.
* Trying to use logic to get her to come back to you. (Women do not make decisions based on logic. They make decisions based on emotions)
* Shutting her off from your life completely and being totally passive about her
It is hard to believe, but actually all of the actions stated above actually drive your ex girlfriend away from you. Those actions are only making your chances to get back with ex girlfriend a lot smaller. That is because women do not make their decisions based on their thoughts. They make their decisions based on their feelings. Most of the mistakes stated are basically harassing your ex girlfriend and that makes her feel bad.
If you are serious and want to get back with your ex girlfriend, then DO NOT make those mistakes!
If you make lots of mistakes you will push her away. Let’s say you like to go fishing. You go fishing every Saturday. Not only for the fishing, but for chilling with a friend, a group of friends, your son etc. It is a good way to relax. But there is a downside to this – your girl might not like the fact that you go fishing all the time. I’m not saying you have to change for her, but maybe you should spend a Saturday with her. Go to the cinema with her to watch a nice movie, have a picnic or just have fun with her. That will make her feel good for sure and she will see, that you care about her.
If you are thinking “How can I get my ex girlfriend back” , then you must show her respect. You can’t feel mad that she left you. If you keep those feelings deep inside, then they will come back up and cause lots of problems once you have her back. That means you will not keep her – she will be gone soon.
So now you know how to get ex girlfriend back. Please don’t make any stupid mistakes, just respect her and be yourself.
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Filed under Your Ex by on Jan 18th, 2010.
Making up with an ex can be a great and loving time for us it has been a long and painful time of separation or newly happened and unexpected.
When thinking the thoughts of getting back together with your ex, at times you might even have a demanding voice in the back of your mind that is speaking from time to time, getting you to have second thoughts on if you are doing the right thing.
It is crucial to keep aware of that for a while, you may not be your normal self.Normally, this is because you are emotionally drained and are in a probable depressed emotional space.
You may be confused, conflicted and deeply confused on what to do. You may be thinking that you should call your ex or just stop by. Control yourself, don’t do it yet!
May we strongly urge that you not react, while feelings are running high. That is hardly the best time to make any kind of impulsive, sudden, and panic-stricken decisions.
Fortunately, most relationships can be repaired and emotional healing can begin to heal and restore the relationship to its former glory and beyond.
Remember, that does not mean that this can occur without work from the both of you. Making up with an ex will take a lot of energy and honesty.
Before you even prepare yourself to travel that road of making up with an ex here are 3 important steps that can help you evaluate your circumstances with a clear mind. Hopefully, these will help you get to a quality evaluation of your goal.
1.> Take a breather. Cry a little and accept the fact that you have broken up. Do not be hurtful. Do not say and do things that you probably will regret later. Sure, you are hurt and in pain, but it is critically important that you show resolve, character and quality judgment as you both try to go through a difficult time.
2.> Stop, think it through! Evaluate slowly and methodically consider, quite heavily, what was the origin for the break up in the very first place. You have to be able to clearly understand this reason or reasons that created the breakup of your love. Very often, it is some little thing that took on a life of its own and got out of hand.
3.> Read some books on healing, listen to motivational cd’s to teach yourself regarding the steps of relationship building that are needed ingredients to building a long-term rewarding relationship. It will help to begin crafting a bright, intuitive and flexible, appreciative new attitude.
When calling your ex, let them know that you would like to meet with them and just have a friendly talk regarding your relationship. Try to do something relaxing, such as going out for coffee or a stroll around the block.
Play, laugh and have a comfortable chat that allows for you to express yourself, letting them know how you feel and make time so they can share their thoughts, heart and mind with you. Making up with an ex can change your whole world. Just be honest that you are doing it for all the right reasons.
Author: Jeff Gadley
Jeff@911BreakUpRepair.com
Filed under Your Ex by on Jan 14th, 2010.